What Do You Want?

It’s funny how some of us decide to live our lives. We desire ‘A’ and yet go about doing everything that will ensure we don’t get it

For the ladies, you take pictures with your hips, boobs and butt as the key point of your every picture. Some also add the lips too; lips that has been doused with a huge amount of paint lipstick. But when you get objectified, you get angry and say stuff like “men are pervs”. The fact is this; guys like the boobs and butt BUT it’s not the kind of like you want. It’s a hit and run, ruff and tumble kind of relationship that you’re sure to witness. Most guys have erotic thoughts and for them you fit the bill; nothing more.

Just as there are wife materials, there are also one-night materials too. You don’t have to be in the latter category. Find your purpose, write a vision and run with it (It is not easy but it is possible). And please, marrying a rich man doesn’t count as a vision.

For guys, you can’t keep taking pictures of you in different exotic cars, or with different popular people, or in exclusive events and later on start screaming that “women are only after your money”. You see the next voluptuous lady and you lose control almost immediately. You bare your soul to her almost instantly and come back in few months lamenting how “women are wicked”.

Please understand, that my mission is not to condemn you, i’m simply not qualified as I am not without foolish errors and misgivings. I write to show you a view you possibly never knew existed or simply ignored.

In general, people come after you based on what you advertise most. And so if you keep attracting the same kind of people; people you don’t desire; you may have to look inward and make necessary changes.

But then again, we just hate truth and would rather believe a lie. It’s the only reason why a politician would read you promises of a lifetime he has planned for 4 years. The manifesto period turns into a case of “who can lie most”? Nigeria’s problems cannot be solved in 4 years because it is a deep rooted one in our minds that we must be willing to eradicate. Forgive my digression, I just had to go there.

Our problem is our mindset. We believe in the wrong things for the wrong reasons based on sentimental notions we have harbored for donkey years.

But not me, not anymore. I have decided to retrace my steps and follow the path less travelled. Would you join me?

Our Politicians Are Not Corrupt

“Our politicians are corrupt” is a widely accepted and endorsed belief by majority of the Nigerian populace.

I believe differently; Our politicians are not corrupt, we as a people are corrupt.

How? Let me explain with some scenarios;

1. If you’ve ever “rounded-up” figures in a bid to get extra change, you’re no different from the politicians who do the same in a bid to get extra change

2. If you’ve ever lied to save your neck, you’re no different from the politicians who do the same.

3. If you’ve ever shunted in traffic or jumped the queue, you’re no different from the politicians who bend or circumvent the laws already laid down.

4. If you’ve ever stolen something, you’re no different from the politicians who steal in the millions and billions

5. If you’ve ever performed less than you were assigned on a project or taken a longer break than was allowed for no cogent reason, you’re no different from the politicians who do the same at the expense of national matters.

6. If you’ve ever promised something you were not certain of fulfilling, you’re no different from the politicians who tell us beautiful tales whenever they’re vying for a position.

7. If you’ve ever kept silent about a wrong done in your organization or around you, you’re no different from some politicians who keep quiet when their counterparts wreck havoc.

8. If you’ve ever given a friend or family a job or contract whose ability you could not fully ascertain, you’re no different from politicians who give out contracts based on favor and not ability.

Finally, if you’ve ever done any wrong in your life, you’re no different from some of our politicians.The only thing that separates you and the thieving and corrupt politician is OPPORTUNITY. Those stealing billions now once stole little thousands; a gradual process.

This piece is not meant to justify the wrongs of the politicians. Rather it is a challenge for us to rise up and do the best we can with all honesty, discipline and integrity.

If we want a change, we must look at our mirrors and begin from the image we see there. Our present crop of politicians cannot rule foreverand in due time some of us would get the opportunity to also lead.

I reiterate; Nigeria doesn’t have corrupt politicians, Nigeria has corrupt people. And until we change, the vicious cycle of corruption would forever hold sway.

Radicals Or Conservatives

There are 2 kinds of people in this world; Radicals and Conservatives.

Why people act alike, think alike and behave alike despite their natural ability to be different and unique baffle me. It is no marvel that they end up just like the others. They hate change because “that’s how it has always been”. But who can blame them? It is safer to tread a known path. Taking a turn away from what you’re used to can be very scary; remember that first plane you flew in or the first time you climbed that elevator/escalator (ok so maybe you were not scared but I was stupefied and petrified). But it still doesn’t change the fact that both of them are much faster and convenient. Yes you’re right, it’s the conservatives.

Despite the fact that it’s so hard, there are still some who strain eyes and mind to tread a new pathway. They are tired of the status quo. Countless times they have been willing to lay their lives for their beliefs. Countless hours have they put into what they held true and even though they were faced with the usual vehement refusal, they still held on. It took a toll on their families, friends and their life yet they didn’t let go. You just have to admire them. Talk about radicals.

One of the few things I know is that there are endless possibilities; there are so many things you can achieve as long as you’re willing to stick your neck out for it.

Because you are human, it is certain that there are some ‘crazy’ ideologies, concepts, epiphanies you have that the world has never seen. But no, you decided to play it down because of fear, ridicule and the million other reasons that are ever present.

Well I cannot deny that you’ve been a dedicated, enthusiastic and committed prison guard but it’s time to take up something more lucrative. Today, break the shackles that hold captive your wildest thoughts, dreams. Let these words serve as the dynamites that destroy the iron bars and chains that hold them.

Treat them well; feed them with facts and knowledge, discipline and all the other good stuffs. I know pretty soon we’ll hear about you in the news and lest I forget, don’t forget to add in your imminent TV/MAG interviews that the piece Radicals OR Conservatives inspired you! lol

A Maxim

Ying & Yang

So I’m pretty sure you’ve heard about the maxim “Compare yourself to no one”. Permit me to describe 2 varying ideologies that revolve around it.

In the first ideology are Indritites; people who believe a lot about ‘finding’ yourself, discovering yourself and knowing your strengths and weaknesses. They encourage you to be yourself and to do things your way, how and when you want to. The positive aspect cannot be overlooked or over stated because for one it eliminates clones; people who move with the crowd with no bearing. Perhaps a subtle disadvantage it holds, the greatest I think is that some people sell themselves short. They believe they don’t have the mettle to top their league. Worse still is the fact that people around who excel at different fields are not enough to inspire them because “we are not the same” (in their words).

In the second ideology are drivinades those who are of the opinion that they can or should do what their peers are doing. So they push themselves and do all in their power to stay afloat. The upside is that they keep getting inspired to do better at what they do; the story of complacency is but a fable to them. The fall side is as common as its counterpart; Individuals here try all in their means and even above to keep up with the Joneses, portraying all they’re not all in a bid to keep up with ‘friends’. While some crash with not being able to keep up, others keep up the façade till their dying breath.

Whichever ideology you hold dear, finding the balance between both is the KEY to living your dream.

*Indritites and Drivinades were ‘specially’ coined for this piece.